From the Ranch

From the Ranch

Sunday, April 28, 2013

Open Letter Concerning the Children Involvred in the Camp Pendleton "Attempted Adultery" Case

I know, I just continue to beat this to death, but you have to understand, from where I sit, no one is supporting this family.  These three Marines, who have experienced failure of leadership, had the right to expect it, (leadership.)  The UCMJ, and how the military is run, gives extreme latitude to commanders to handle all kinds of situations.  That is done on the premise that no one who isn't experienced, wise, and honorable will make it to a command position. Unfortunately, that premise is completely untrue.  

I am once again of course, talking about the situation at Camp Pendleton, where a female Marine has been accused of lying, by at first trying to deny what happened, and then alleging rape due to her being so intoxicated she was not able to consent to sex.  She admits now she went to a motel with another Marine, and had sex with the male Marine who was serving in the same building that she did.  That Marine said he didn't know she was married, and she didn't look too drunk to him.  Evidence of a bar tab that indicated that the 4'10" female could be nothing but indeed completely intoxicated, didn't seem to move the judge.  

The male Marine was charged with nothing,
as he claimed he didn't know she was married,
and she didn't look, "too drunk" to him... R...I...G...H...T...
There is just to much in this case to argue all of it at once.  What complete failure of command skills is demonstrated in this whole thing!           

The thing is, she is married to a Marine.  When she told him after he kept arguing with her because of her attitude and depression for about a month after the incident, he went straight to her unit and reported it. 

 As a side note, that contact was the exact point of the initial and complete failure of judgment, you know who you are, but I doubt you will ever be held accountable in light of how things are going now.  That is how the chain of command is designed, so that the least level of command is utilized to solve problems, ensure every person serving is protected and cared for, due to the fact that military life is extremely demanding, not only to the person serving, but to their entire family as well. 

I have knowledge what-so-ever about any person serving at Camp Pendleton, no dog in the fight because of any personal knowledge of any individual involved in this situation, and therefore no personal biases involving people I previously have know.  My conclusions are drawn without the biases of acquaintanceship, professional relationship, friendship, kinship, or gossip from others with such relationships. They are drawn from my knowledge of UCMJ, having watched a great deal of 
commanders at command, including the good, the bad, and the ugly, and to having watched many, many, members of the military in service to this country, to each individual holding citizenship in this country, and to the people of the world at large.  They have my complete devotion and support as long as they serve.

I have blogged about how this will affect the number of sexual assaults reported at Camp Pendleton in such a way as to empower predators, not just at Camp Pendleton, but everywhere in the militaryAs I have said, you won't be able to convince any unbiased, thinking person that this little incident is going to encourage reporting.  I am so resisting writing Duh...


I have blogged about the very apparent different standards any given individual can expect from the UCMJ, and how justice can be contrived and contorted for any whim or reason conceivable, by any number of people involved in the process along the way.  I have all but screamed, "why didn't that first person receiving this report understand that he was dealing with three individuals who have borne the battle of the last almost twelve years of their lives in the Global War on Terror, and act in the wisdom and experience of that knowledge?"  I have wondered in print why this individual, (I know they have been trained to recognize these things, ) did not act from the place of respect and understanding of all it has cost this military family, and require privately, marriage and individual counseling.  Both of the Marines have been deployed to the Middle East, and drinking too much, marital problems, and engaging in risky behavior as well as periods of depression are hallmarks of PTSD, any NCO should easily recognize and deal with the situation, in that experience, wisdom, and honor I previously mentioned.  Then no one would have to endure my maternal lectures, but he or she didn't, and I hope they never sleep again. 

The point of focus I want to make today is concerning the eight year old and twelve year old children of this military couple, and what I am certain the actions of their parents and this command has brought upon them.  Their parents I believe are due sympathy and understanding, not to mention help from us all.  Their command I wish to see crucified.  If you are not military, if you have not spent extensive time around those who have been to this war, you will read these words clueless.  Please, hear me, this family has sacrificed and suffered for us all.  This family deserves our help and support.  These two children were born during the War on Terror to a military family, we owe them consideration. This family deserves justice, not being manipulated by puffed up, self serving, and failed command.  I do not believe that the DoD has the will or the understanding of the situation to do the right thing.  You should write and call every Congressional Representative and every Senator your own personal conscious demands, and demand a congressional inquiry, demand the verdict be reversed, and demand the removal from command of all those demonstrating profound failure in judgment.  I fully recognize, some of you will not be moved at all, but then there are plenty of good Americans everywhere, and that is why we remain the greatest country the world has ever known.  So read what I wrote in tribute to military children everywhere the world over, wherever they may be serving and sacrificing.  April is the month of the Military Child.  Our governmental leadership should prove that is not just a token sentiment.

Family Day, 1st BCTG, 75th Division Army Reserves, they won the push up contest!

The next part of this blog is a repeat of something I wrote way back, and it is re-posted in dedication to an eight year old, and a twelve year old I do not know, but personally hold in great regard and admiration.  It is in part, upon their behalf, I am making my own requests to Congress and the Senate to intervene in this situation, and to remove, in order that they cause no more harm to those serving, and the mission of the United States Military, those in command whose failure to show judgment has inflicted great harm to the military, and to their families.  Semper Fi never meant more. 
In April of 2009, on the way to a VFW meeting right before my husband, COL (R.) Randy LeCompte, deployed for war, our grand-son, Tristen, who was then six asked from the back seat, "Nana, how are we going to keep Papa Randy safe when he goes to war?"  I told him we would pray for him that God would keep him safe, because there was nothing that he and I could do, we are just human beings.  I told him we could pray that God would send angels to protect him.  I firmly believe that the earnest prayers of that little boy and others have been what has kept my husband safe for the past three years.

My daughter who served for eight years in the United States Army, married a Soldier.  After 9/11 she left the Arm,y worried that she and her husband might both be deployed at the same time.  She now works in the civilian sector of the Army.  Her husband returned from his fifth overseas deployment back in November.  They are both serving in Germany at this time.  Samantha and Gabby are my two grand-daughters who were born into this military family and have never known anything but the life of military kids. There are thousands of "military kids," and the people of our country, and other countries, should see to it that they do not stand in need of anything while their parent is absent at war.

One of the most defining moments of this conflict for me occurred when Samantha was about four or five and riding in the backseat of the car with her cousin Madie as we went to Walmart for things we needed to cook Thanksgiving dinner.  She was sitting quietly in the backseat, and asked a question that brought home to me the price of war for children who come from military families.  She asked, "Nana, does the enemy have families too?"  I knew I had to answer in honesty, and I replied," probably some of them do".  Then she asked a question I had no answer for.  She went on to ask, "Nana, if my daddy kills their daddy, who will take care of them?"

  Samantha playing the Army Song at a school program, Ft. Hood, Killeen, Texas

 I have wept many times, for many reasons, as I have thought again of those questions from such a small child.  I have thought of our own countries' children, the children of Coalition forces from countries around the world, the children from  Iraq and Afghanistan, and yes, the children of the enemy.  What a price these innocents have paid over the last ten plus years.

It isn't just the small children of military families that bear the burden of war.  Who more than a young teen needs their father or mother?  The older a child grows, I think the more acutely an absent parent is missed.  The award ceremonies where there is someone glaringly absent from the audience, the basketball games, the broken hearts, and the lectures that should sternly be given, fall to only one parent.  A phone call lecture just isn't the same. Nor is the congratulations offered over the phone, the same as that hug in person that says, "What a job well done!"  The suit picture of prom sent in an email doesn't feel the same as the kidding and smiling faces of proud parents as a young man leaves for prom.  There are pictures with mother, but not with father.  

There are even grown children who sacrifice holidays, birthdays, and the ability to call a parent on their cell phone for advice, or just to express their love, while a parent serves.  As with every age child of those in military service, some have had a parent return from war never to be the same again due to injuries sustained.   Some see their parent for the last time in a flag draped coffin.  Their sacrifice unnoticed or forgotten by most of the people that it was made for. 

Then there are the babies... infants born while a parent is at war.  I can't imagine labor and delivery without the father of the child I was bringing into the world at my side, but there are women in this country, and in the countries of all those who make up the Coalition Forces who have done just that.  I can vividly imagine however, the thoughts going through that woman's mind, and the state of her heart.  I wrote two poems about these babies who change everyday, who say their first words, take their first steps, cry through cutting their first teeth, and grow each day without the loving gaze of a proud father.  

 Rock Gently the Cradle Lullaby 

Rock gently the cradle of the Soldier’s baby where he sleeps.

Make certain he has no need that you have resources to meet.

Who would not with his life his son or daughter defend,

If an enemy stood in plain sight ready to make that child’s life end?

Somewhere across great oceans a Soldier tonight,

Stands for his country ready to fight.

Keeping watch to protect not only the son he left behind,

He keeps watch too for your son and mine.

For each of us, our children hold fast our hearts,

In order for them to grow up in liberty, someone to war must depart.

Remember the sacrifices of those left behind and take care should they weep.

Rock gently the cradle of the Soldier’s baby where he sleeps. 

I Came Home to My Daughter

There she lay, so warm, pink, soft, and sweet.
When first we finally did meet.

I saw so much of her mother there in her eyes,
The stamp of my own features on her countenance threatened to make me cry.

Wonder at the first sight of my darling daughter,
Swept my soul, and I knew my life she would forever alter.

Feelings too tender for the battlefield,
In that moment caused all my vigilance briefly to yield.

Then I realized more clearly than ever before,
I was called to war because of an evil good people everywhere deplore.

My newborn child and all the children of the world,
Need those of us in service, the flag of liberty to unfurl.

In my daughter’s face I saw the hope of our world and our nation,
Waiting for her contributions, which true peace will hasten.

I knew that in a land far away, where long I had stood the wall,
Children were seeing first hand our intent in the service of us all.

As they watch, I know they too will learn,
Their own hearts for peace and liberty will come to yearn.

In this the power of the enemy will disappear,
The truth of all our brotherhood will finally do away with all fear.

So though my heart longs to stay,
I will again return to the war zone in just a few short days.

In my mind, images of her gentle beauty,
Will give me strength and bring complete commitment to my sacred duty.

Talking by phone with my grand-children is always precious time to me.  I miss them more than I can describe.  Gabby in particular has such a devotion for the ministry we conduct at our little place called Soldier's Heart Ranch.  We didn't know when we first purchased the property and christened it Soldier's Heart Ranch that during the Revolutionary and the Civil War, Soldiers who suffered from symptoms of PTSD, (post traumatic stress disorder) were said to be suffering from Soldier's Heart.  We had, by accident, selected a name that would reflect the cause we would publicly dedicate our home to Memorial Day, 2012.  A statistic of war that you won't find just everywhere, for the statistics are managed so that they do not appear all together, but must be assembled to get the true picture, haunts my mind everyday, and prompts me to dedicate my life to serving families of the military.  In 2010, 462 men and women gave up their lives in combat, 468 took their own lives.  Many of those Soldiers had children too.

Our grand-daughters, whose family is stationed in Germany, will not be able to attend this dedication ceremony, and Gabby is probably the ranch's biggest fan.  When she calls me, (almost daily) all she wants to talk about is what is going on at the ranch.  Today when she called she wanted to write a poem about the ranch and "military kids."  So I helped her with making her words rhyme, and here are the results.  Read the words of a seven year old child who does not understand well the meaning of war, but none the less, has sacrificed for her country.  Someone's father or mother must go, for many of our military are women, and surely without the defense made by these men and women, none of our children will know liberty.

 Gabby's Poem  
Sometimes even a Soldier needs a quiet place to rest,
When he has worked hard and given his best.

Their children at home offer prayers to God above.
Asking Him to send His protection on wings like a dove.

God hears and answers their sweet prayers.
When their petitions are lifted for the fathers who dare.

To face evil enemies who against our country make war.
Freedom and liberty are what they are standing for.

They ask the Heavenly Father their mom or dad to defend,
As the struggle goes on to make the fighting end. 

In this photo you just have to note that Gabby insisted this day on wearing Papa Randy's boots... all day long.

Being in a military family involves many sacrifices.  The rewards can be equally fulfilling as well.  That happens if the one serving makes the time and effort to not only live a life of sacrifice and service before their children, but in that service they carefully communicate the importance of honor and devotion to sacred duty.  The other parent must also support and be committed to service.  That must be evidenced by both parents lives and all they say and do, as the reason they serve.  There is a special set of skills, a special identity, and the knowledge of how to live with purpose "above the common man," as General Douglas  MacArthur stated in his most famous speech, that is the reward that comes to the children of those who truly serve God and country.  They are empowered by the ideals lived before them, rather than being disadvantaged by the sacrifices required.  May God richly bless the children of those who serve, and may His mercy be with all the children who live with the reality of war.

Samantha, Gabby, Brian, and Rebecca, thank you for your many sacrifices for our country.  Brian and Becky, your father and I commend you personally.  You are both persons of courage who have been through much. Thank you, and we publicly acknowledge all you have given.  Samantha and Gabby, Papa Randy and Nana have watched all you have sacrificed too, you have both done well.  We love you, are proud of you, and hope to see you all soon.